Get your shit together, Marvel.

[bohemia]

Jonah Hill is losing weight "to be healthier." I called it. If it's really to be healthy, good on him, but it really just makes me hate Hollywood. You don't need to be a size 2 to be healthy.

Anyway, yesterday I saw X-Men: First Class. I didn't want to see it and some of you know how I am really not a fan of James McAvoy or Fassbender (good actors, but the fangirls have killed them for me over the years). I knew they would destroy continuity as they have been with every X-Men movie so far. From what I can recall, X2 may have been the most faithful of them all. I know I had "nerdy rage," as squoctobird says, over the first and third films and completely dismissed the Wolverine movie (the PS3 game, though, is awesomeee!), and didn't pay attention to anything surrounding this movie at all. But it was supposed to be a day out with some friends and I decided I'd go. It ended up just being me and one friend who showed up, saw the movie and then went our separate ways. But whatever, it was a night I wasn't sitting at home.

But I do have some faults with this movie too:


• Havok is Cyclops' younger brother. In the movieverse he's now thirty years older (some say he's supposed to be Cyclops' father in the movieverse? BUT WHAT ABOUT CORSAIR.)
• Emma Frost turns into diamond. Diamond is the hardest substance on Earth. When someone walks into a room, she turns diamond in defense. HOW CAN YOU CHOKE/TIE-UP DIAMOND WITH GOLD.
• In X3: Last Stand there's a flashback where an older Charles and Erik meet Jean Grey as a child. Erik wasn't Magneto yet.
• I don't know much about this Angel Salvadore, but way to confuse people with Warren's Angel.
• Way to retcon the Blackbird and Cerebro's origins... again.
• Also wtf retcon on Charles and Erik's friendship origins.
• Charles was totally bald by the time he entered college.
• Nazi Sebastian Shaw, what.
• Mystique is probably a LOT older than even Charles.

• Let's just ignore how the very first class of X-Men was Cyclops, Jean Grey, Iceman, Angel and Beast. And how Mystique wasn't an X-Man until recently. Or how Azazel isn't a part of the Hellfire Club and Riptide is a Marauder.


• Hank/Raven? Really?
• Also, REALLY CREEPY ERIK/RAVEN DNW. AT LEAST KEEP HER AS REBECCA FOR THAT ONE MOMENT. WTF, MATTHEW VAUGHN.
• That moment when Erik mentions the word "slave" and they cut to Darwin. -_-
• Is the idea that Hank accidentally grabbed the serum for Raven and it overreacted, or was he just going to turn blue anyway?
• Har har at Logan, and Doctor Jekyll references.
• I lol'd at my audience because half of them were like, "OMG, he killed Charles!" NO, YOU FOOLS.
• OH HEY ORORO <33
• No Stan Lee :(
• Fuck, there were some slashy lines/moments for Charles/Erik and their bromance is pretty much legendary but I'll be over in my corner, ignoring those fangirls and rolling in the non-existant Havok/Darwin. I know I wasn't the only one who saw it, but we're being overshadowed by the Charles/Erik.


But the movie itself, once you put all of that aside, was really good! I wasn't invested in the characters and didn't really care but I didn't feel like it dragged and hit all the plot points when it needed to and tied itself up nicely.

I also just saw Super, which was really dark and The Green Hornet which was more entertaining than I expected. I've been on a movie bender lately, but I haven't been impressed with the majority of them. It just makes me want to keep going and hopefully find a new movie to put among my favorites. But so far, no dice. :/

Comments

[demented2468.livejournal.com]

Never been in these sot of things bet some of them can bee good when they are done right

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

I just tend to take X-Men more seriously because they are my favorite team of superheroes. I never have as many problems with other superhero movies--I probably gloss over the inaccuracies in others--but I know too much about the X-Men for me to let every little thing pass by.

[splits_thesky]

.....loooool, I love how this is a loooong list of everything sucky about the movie, and then you're like, "but no, it was good!!"<3333333

But, uh, the very first class of X-Men was Cyclops, Jean Grey, Iceman, Angel and Beast = IS THIS NOT A THING, IN THE MOVIE???? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU~~



....also, MOAR ABT SUPER, PLZ.

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

Dude, the movie is Havok, Banshee, Beast.... Mystique and Charles as siblings, pretty much, and Magneto honing skills by way of Charles. Havok is the first one to try out "the danger room" and such. EVERYTHING IS WRONG. I remember when they were making the movie and I heard it was when Charles is younger and then they were like the White Queen is in it too! And I was like, "Fuck you, Marvel, I'm done with you." I didn't even learn anything past the characters because I was like, "'TIS RUINED, WHATEVS."

But when it ended my friend was like, "Did you like it?" And I smiled and went, "Fuck, not gonna lie, that was good." I wanna go back and watch the first two just ignoring how they cast things and such and see if I like them more. The third was fail all over.... and I thought I'd posted on LJ about it but apparently that was back at Xanga and shit if I know where I put THAT.

Ugh, idek, dude, it was mostly just Rainn Wilson being sad because his wife is a druggie and leaves him for Kevin Bacon and Ellen Page just RLY RLY WANTS TO BE A PART OF THIS REVENGE SCHEME. But like, I have seen Kick-Ass, Defendor and this and IT'S PRETTY MUCH THE SAME SHIT OVER AND OVER AGAIN. Except this one was like drugs! rape scene! random people over their heads and getting shot/killed! another rape scene! obsessive teenager wanting to be rly rly in love with an older man (rly, what is Ellen Page's DEALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, didn't we cover this in Hard Candy almost pretty much?)! poor citizens caught up in the mix and getting paralyzed! Nathan Fillion as.... the Christian TV version of Superman? I still don't understand what that was, but it was funny even if I was a little like, "Rainn Wilson, why are you watching this show?"

I was expecting the Superhero version of Slither and.... what I got was Kick-Ass: the Super Dark & Perverted Edit.

[splits_thesky]

.....aaaaand now I'm back to being unsure if I want to see it. But I think, what I'm getting from people who've seen it (including you!) is that it's good, buuuut it's not right. Sooo, yeah, something I'll eventually see on Netflix/from Fight Club, I guess.

But, UGH, SUPER, I AM DISAPPOINT!! :(((((
I was like, "Awesome actors! Superheroes! WHAT CAN GO WRONG???", aaaand now, apparently, the answer is EVERYTHING.
Like, uh, I tend to be really sensitive to shows/movies??? Like, how I can't watch the US Office without getting embarrassment squicked out, or, uh, how we watched a clip from Crash in that cultural competency training at work the other day (...idk if you've seen it...?? Buuut basically Matt Dillon was being SUPER racist and offensive and harrass-y), and it seriously bothered me the ENTIRE rest of the day. Sooo, like, WAY TO BE, SUPER, YOU HAVE NOW RUINED YOURSELF FOR ME. >:|

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

Well, I mean, if I had the choice I'd just watch Kick-Ass again, instead? Soooo idk. Like Kick-Ass was a bit awkward for me to watch, too, but not as much as Super.

ALSO DUDE NOOOOOOOOOO MATT DILLON IS SUCHHHHHHHHHHH A DICK IN THAT MOVIE BUT I LOVEEEEEE THAT MOVIE. I totally circled the day it was on DVD and went out and bought it immediately. Also, the whole point of that movie is everyone being dicks and changing (or not, with disastrous results, in the end). Actually, I think that's the movie responsible for my INTENSE FASCINATION WITH PAUL HAGGIS. After that I'd just go see movies with his name attached because like, "THE GUY WROTE CRASH, SHUT UP, THIS'LL BE EPICCCCCCCCC." (And then Quantum of Solace happened.) But yeah, I can see why you wouldn't be able to get through that movie. It sort of needed to be that awkward for people to get the point (sort of like Young Adam, which is another movie I adore but UGH SO AWKWARD,) but also... awkward, right.

[splits_thesky]

I will probably eventually see Kick-Ass!! ......aaaaand probably Super, okay, okay, one day when I'm feeling up to it.

Well, like, I've never seen the whole thing, so idk!! But yeahhh, like, I knew(/know) the basic plot as, "Look how racist everyone is!!", soooo yeah, I KNOW, I KNOW, DNW IN A MOVIE. ......plus, like, DALLY WINSTON, WHAT ARE YOU DOOOOOINNNGGGGG. :((((((

[l-vera01.livejournal.com]

I grew up with the cartoon series on tv, which isn't the comics but one thing the show instilled in me was a love for the team as a whole, which X2 & X3 & the Wolverine movies destroyed. Xmen are my first superhero loves & I cannot muster up the interest for this movie. Doesn't help that I think Patrick Stewart is far better than JM, in general & not just as CX. Have't seen MF in anything though.

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

I totally started off on the cartoon and then got into the comics when I realized the cartoon was based off of something. Before that I thought comics were just Batman and Superman. :)

I feel the same way!!! The only reason I went was to hang with my friends. And JM can never be Patrick Stewart.

[cvionic29.livejournal.com]

I like the film but there were a lot of mistakes. AND NO STAN LEE. D:

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

WHY WAS THERE NO STAN LEE? I don't understand it. :(

[cvionic29.livejournal.com]

He tweeted about this actually.

His tweets:
1st
2nd
3rd

I kept waiting for him and thinking that maybe I missed him. :(

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

Awww, that sucks! I totally didn't realize it was filmed overseas, but it WOULD BE. British actors, director, etc, etc. Bummer. Obviously he needs to be in The Avengers twice to make up for it. :D

[cvionic29.livejournal.com]

I approve of your idea! :D

[cinemawesomee.livejournal.com]

I liked the it too even though there were a shit ton of mistakes. AND I WILL FAP TO ERIC/CHARLES ALL BY MYSELF IN PEACE, OKAY? IT WAS HOT. I kept expecting them to make out tbh. Overall it was decent and I'd still watch it any day over X-3.

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

lol, Tumblr has me shipping them more than I would've, but I really prefer Erik/Charles in the comics to this one.

My friend said this one made up for X3 and Wolverine, lol.

[sugareey.livejournal.com]

So, perhaps it might be worth it to see one of these three? Maybe?

Also, congrats on graduating! *hugs*

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

Of the X-Men movies or the movies I mentioned? Because of the movies I mentioned I'd recommend Green Hornet and maybe X-Men First Class, but not Super--unless you were perfectly fine with Kick-Ass's awkwardly realistic moments, or any movie that had the same sort of tags either film has on imdb. People on imdb seem to like Super the best but it was a bit too dark for me.

[splits_thesky]

WHICH AU DOES THIS BELONG TO (or....ALL OF THEM~).



...and yes, that is totally the first thing I thought, when I saw that picture on my dash. :D

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

LULZ, I was like, "Well obviously it's the one where Jamie Bell is a drummer for a queercore band and Channing is the douchey, drunky best friend of the wallflower Catholic school nerd--WAIT, THAT DOESN'T MATCH UP."

But okay, Jamie Bell is the bassist (it just seems to fit him better?) for a queercore band that just got signed to DecayDance and Channing is the rapping frontman from DD's star rock n' roll/hip-hop fusion band and they're both on the Warped Tour and well, IT'S TOUR ANTICS AND SHIT, NEW BAND ON THE SCENE GETS TAKEN AROUND BY THE POPULAR KIDS, DRUGS, SEX AND BUTTSEX ("That's the saying, right?" Jamie says, his nervous chuckle dying in his throat when he realizes everyone is just staring at him and internally shaking their heads at him. "It was a joke," he says, losing the smile fast and glancing quickly at Mark, their drummer. From the look on Mark's face, he's already said too much. Channing steps forward, moves the lollipop in his mouth to the other side and talks around it. "'ight, 'ight, good try. I think you'll fit in nicely. Come with me," he says, slinging his arm around Jamie's neck and pulling him towards the kitchenette.") WHAT HAPPENS ON TOUR STAYS ON TOUR.

Or something.

[splits_thesky]

lulz, aww, I want THAT movie/book!! NICK AND DRUNKY FRIEND'S INFINITE DRUNKY PLAYLIST.

OMG, BEST (also, loooooooooool omg, Channingggg<333333).

See, I was gonna be like, Channing is taking a photography course and Jamie is his super shy boyfriend (.....he can still totally be in a band, though. ACTUALLY, YYYYY, HE SHOULD BE), and for one assignment Channing has to focus on shadows, or something, and so he takes pictures of other things, but he rly needs a super ~compelling shot, so he's like, "JAMIE, ~POSE FOR ME~", and Jamie is unsure about it, because, idk, he is SUPER SHY (...idk, maybe Channing is actually shooting for an exhibition or something, where SO MANY PEOPLE will see the pictures), buuuuut then he does, and, uh, this is what happens.

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

LULZ, SHOOT HIM LIKE ONE OF YOUR FRENCH GIRLS, CHANNING!!

[splits_thesky]

LOOOOOOOOOL OMG, TRUE STORY, I WAS SO CLOSE TO PUTTING THAT IN MY COMMENT, AND THEN DECIDED NOT TO, AT THE LAST MINUTE. BRAINTWINZZZ-NESS STRIKES AGAIN!!

[violetlemon47.livejournal.com]

I really, really liked Super. I was excited to see The Green Hornet, but I was sick when I watched it and I swear it seemed like it was about 6 hours long. :/

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

People keep telling me Super was hilarous so I'm thisclose to watching it again and seeing where I missed the funny.

Green Hornet really is LOOOOOOOONG, yeah. But I did enjoy the effects and the storyline.

[violetlemon47.livejournal.com]

I don't think Super was that funny. I mean, it was funny, but it was such dark humor that I don't think I could describe it as hilarious. I just really liked the story.

[chiasmus.livejournal.com]

I SAW THE HAVOK/DARWIN, TOO. Then was sadfaced when Darwin died.

I read that Hank would have turned blue anyway, regardless of which one it had been.

Did not want the Raven pairings the movie was giving either. :/

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

DARWINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN :( I was expecting so much slash AND THEN STUPID SHAW. >:|

I assumed so, but the way they made a point of him PICKING UP THE NEEDLE. LOOK, HE GRABBED ONE OF TWO NEEDLES. DID YOU SEE THE NEEDLES? I wondered...

Yeah, idk, why she was the movie's bicycle. Raven is fairly charming, sure, but from what I can remember, she is not easy.

[splits_thesky]

http://kickdrumheart.tumblr.com/post/20249574701/tardiscrash-tonys-boypussy-sob-i-felt-like

http://electrumqueen.livejournal.com/317854.html?thread=1911198

[bohemu.livejournal.com]

BDSJHFADHVLIA FHWQIDVW QD I LOVVVVEEEE TTHHHEEEMMMM